Come be a supporter.

So the life of the unemployed is taking on new meaning. Instead of laying around reading books for pleasure (joy!) I find myself busy beyond belief as I pursue new and creative, innovative endeavors.

I'm learning a jackload about things I've always wanted to know, and I *will* turn some of these projects into money-producing scenarios in the near future. That creates not only profound excitement but also enormous anxiety.

Risking my ass has never seemed so appealing.

There is one holdup, and for me that's my somewhat unorganized household (which is also functioning as my defacto 'office' for now). Piles of this and that are everywhere. Ubiquitous. Far-reaching. I'm a piler. It's easier that way...or rather, it HAS SEEMED EASIER....though it really creates roadblocks to my success.

This is why, today, I declare myself organization-bound on a personal level.
Monique Dot Org

It's interesting because I am such a dichotomy, I can be very organized in a 'worky' way but it doesn't APPEAR like I am because of the PILES. My mind and my physical existence need to be synched.

This is the time.

It's like I'm dating someone new.
Don't lose your lunch: I said it was *like* dating someone new.
I haven't made any major relationship changes, so there's no need to worry.
HOWEVER.
I am transitioning from PC back to Mac.

It's like dating someone new. I am happy. And yet frustrated. I find myself saying, rather frequently: "'what the...?' 'why did you...?' 'I thought I told you I needed you to...' and, of course: 'where did you put that, I gave it to you for safe-keeping!'"

It's not rocket science. It's sort of the antithesis of rocket science. Mrrrh.

I'm currently working on a variety of new projects that will [hopefully!] turn into money-making schemes rapidly. I could tell you what they are, and probably will...once we're ready to launch. Until then, just know that I am empowered AND thwarted by my new platform of productivity: the MacBook.

Love it.
Learning it.
Limping along until I can fly.

That's what I've got for now.

Hello world.

I am, somewhat, back. In the LiveJournally sort of way. At least, I'm not sailing around on a yacht anymore, so I have no more worries about sketchy internet access via the pocket-sized device that *is* a computer, but which many call a "phone."

That phone, incidentally, is now called my iPotty, for I did that thing that so many people do: dropped it in the toilet. I was trying to be careful with it, as irony would demand, when it happened. The upshot was that I somehow cultivated a mysterious reality: IT STILL WORKS. I employed a large array of devices to this end: prayer, swearing, sweating, blotting with toilet paper, immersing phone in a bowl of dry white rice, voo-doo dolls, invocations of dieties that I've never paid much attention to; etc. Thank my lucky stars.

But anyhow. I am landed again. And yet traveling. Next week (tomorrow, in fact) - I'm off to Self Improvement Summer Camp in northern California. I'm pretty sure I'll do things akin to walking on hot coals and testing my personal boundaries: physical, psychological, emotional, etc. I may buy a souvenir. And I will recalibrate myself in temrs of What's Next.

For I no longer have a "job," so I am free and clear.

And it is exciting.

For those who have asked: I will continue to post here. Yes. I will. For it means I make myself check in with me, with the world, with writing, and with life.

If it takes me two weeks more to post next, however: don't be surprised...for sometimes, it is necessary to LIVE life first, write later.

Ta ta.

I've been trying to post an update from my phone....for daaaaays. Today, it posted. But from what I can tell, it only posted the photos. Niiiice.

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

I'm coffee-ing and internet-ing surrounded by pre-shower fishermen and other Sitka early risers who have a need for the outside world, internet-style but who don't have the luxury of the internet at their own boat. Or home. I've always liked this place. I've got a minute or two left before my allotted time runs out on the internet ~ so I'm just signing on to say that this is going to be an INTERESTING summer spent in the company of The Overachiever, The Feral One, the FartMaster, Mister Nice, and K-to-tha-Athy. Always fun, always stories to share. But when I have more time. Last thought, local humor-style: "you'll never find a Tlingit in a Haida bed." HA~!

Wrangell Narrows:

Petersburg waterfront & our wake:

And I am still unable to locate the friggin bathmats....but I will!

Working on a different yacht each year means having to put a puzzle together every time--and currently, I'm just getting an idea where the edges of this puzzle might be. Where the sheets are stored, where the extra lightbulbs are, what do you do with a mobile massage table on a boat without a massage therapist...how can you keep the white carpet white, what happens when 12 passengers are booked on a yacht built to accommodate 10, etc.

Let the good times roll!

Anyhoo. Wrangell Narrows was beautiful - rain, the sweet smell of conifers, and the squeaky-toy cry of eagles at low tide.

Now we head north through Frederick Sound to Chapin Bay for the night...where the fishing's pretty prime...and the beauty will continue!

(time passes....Internet connections wane...)

And it's a new day.

(here's the wake-up shot in Chapin, above)

And now we are off in search of a fresh-caught halibut lunch. Scrumptious!

{{I couldn't post this yesterday, as cell svc ran out--but whatev!}}

I'm still having a great time, even WITH a frickin mouse (or more) inboard, crapping everyplace; with a marginal lack of sheets, and with crew quarters that don't include privacy curtains. Which suuuuuucks. Ah well.

It's still awesome!

(internet connections still wane; what I thought was posted isn't...and so I continue:)

I'm lucky to be working, when so many others are NOT!! I won't be back in Seattle until mid-August at the earliest...which hopefully will give my knee time to heal (?) - & which means I'll get plenty of money even just based on a daily wage scale...which trumps unemployment. Good times.

Because unemployment will be there when times are tougher...but hopefully I won't need that at all.

Good stuff is in the works.

By the way, here's an odd twist: this boat, "Crystal," is registered in Phoenix, AZ. Strange, eh?

I think so.

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

Last night.
My dream.
It...disturbed me.
It...haunts me.
It...came from nowhere.
It...needs to be forgotten.

I dreamed that I was a delegate from someplace in South Texas. I was at a convention, preparing to cast my vote. On the folding chairs to my left, which were empty, I noticed an overcoat and an umbrella. I pondered them as I waited for my turn to ascend to the pulpit and decry judgement regarding who the candidate should be.

Then she approached, laying claim to her overcoat, picking up her umbrella, and giving me a piercing, yearning stare that could only mean one thing...
Hillary.
Placing her warm right hand on my left inner thigh, she leaned her face near to mine, cocking her head to the side as her lips parted *just so.*

"I must tell you," she breathed, her pupils widening slightly and her pheremones rushing toward all of her glandular output stations. She bent her head toward the intimate space between my chin and my shoulder - and then, urgently, she locked her lips onto mine, exposing the inside of my mouth to all of her tastebuds in an increasingly provocative, demanding fashion.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.

The Most Icky, Wierd & Massively Horrid Part Was:
She had such severe halitosis that I could almost taste it.

I woke up, choking, and ran to my toothbrush.

I'm not sure what to make of it all.

The dude at The Bambino greeted me this morning with a somber (yet friendly!) nod as he turned his neighborhood newspaper page* with a flourish: "it's been a long time since we've seen you in here!"

*[he & I both agree that more often than not, it's the neighborhood newspapers where you REALLY learn what's up with the news that matters...zoning issues, neighborhood news that matters, how city ordinances that are being debated will affect your life on a daily basis, etc. we've had lengthy chats on this before, as you can see--]

This fellow doesn't work at the shop, rather he sits inside on one of the five stools that line the counter near the window. It should be noted that the place is large enough for about THREE stools, so the fact that he's sitting on one of the FIVE that they've crammed into the space should not only tell you about the intimate environment that The Bambino presents, but it also provides insight into the dude who chooses to sit there, taking up space as neighborhood caffeine-seekers clamor inside, taking refuge from the ark-worthy weather outside, seeking sustinence and the nectar of the coffee bean.

"Well, I've been a little busy - my job is ending next week," I mentioned. "I'm wrapping things up and looking forward to a few weeks of chill-out time after my last day there on May 15. Until then it promises to be a little crazy."

"Aaah," he smiled. "Your job's eliminated, eh? Microsoft?"

"No," I replied, recalling that maaaaaaany Microsofties were alerted yesterday that their jobs also don't exist any longer. I'm betting their severance is a little bit more robust than mine, but I'm not complaining. "Actually I work at a ski area that has decided to restructure a bit, and they're dismantling the HR department so my job doesn't fit the model any longer."

"No HR?" he choked. A little bit of muffin, which had been stuck to his chin since before our conversation began, absorbed the sputtering coffee dribbles that oozed from his mouth as he reacted to the information. "How do they think they're going to be able to run a business without HR?! Especially that place - it's huge with a gigantic part-time workforce!"

This is a man who looks like The Gerber Baby All Grown Up And After The Atkins Diet. He's got a massive bald head which he shaves in that trendy "balding dude" sort of way. He looks like he used to be a bigger man who has shrunk. He has kind eyes and an intelligent (but not arrogant) charisma. The kind of person who can manage to capture your attention for longer than you realize, because he has this gravitational wisdom that makes you reluctant to part company with him. He's a little bit shaman, a little bit Grandpa, a little bit quirky neighbor, a little bit older brother.

I explained that the administrative aspects of the HR world will be absorbed into the Accounting department, and my more 'strategic' job of training, developing, and strengthening the front-line leaders (as well as the not-so-front-line-leaders) is perceived as an "extra" sort of "fluffy" - [ie, non-essential] - role.

Buh-bye, HR.
Hello, Personnel.

"It's cyclic," he observed. "They'll feel the pain of this decision for years before they actually realize it, and it will cost them more than they can buy back. Eventually they'll bulk back up but during the mean time a lot of organizational knowledge will be lost through attrition."

How could I argue?

"So what's your plan?"
His tongue discovered the soggy muffin crumb on his chin as he pierced me with those brown eyes that soooo matched the vegan chocolate donut I was devouring.

"Oh, who knows?" I shrugged. "I'm in a good position to use this as a jumping off point for the next chapter."

And it's true.
I have NO plan, but I have a LOT of options.

I want to make sure I move forward from this point with my eyes on the WHOLE horizon. I don't want to limit myself in any way. I want to take advantage of the "new beginning" that I'm staring down, while building on past successes and leveraging all of my MIGHT into...The Next Big Thing.

Whatever it is.

I know everybody's already heard of singing sensation Susan Boyle, so perhaps she's old news at this late date, but it's an inspiring story nonetheless. Her spunk, combined with her humility, along with her overwhelming talent...well it makes for great viewing.

Here's the link (not sure it's actually embeddable):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY

My attempt to embed it anyhow:


See what you think.

In other news, I'm back to soccer. As Nicoll told me yesterday: "you're showing signs of age with all of these injuries" - and, once again, she's right. And also wrong. But ultimately, right.

My teammates who are also in the 'near-injured' category include:
- Carly with the back / hip flexor problem
- Alyssa with that wierd quad strain
- Bri and her ankle, though that seems to be getting much better
Important note: all of these girls are 25 or under.
Me? Upper 30s. And still keeping up with them.

Back to soccer means lots of managing-the-soccer-team stuff going on. We're trying to go play at the Gay Games or the Olympics or whatever it is in Koln, Germany (Cologne?! however they like to spell it, I've seen it both ways) next July.

So our fundraising attempts are beginning:
(you may have to click on this to enlarge it)


We're also doing a jackload of community-service stuff along with our blatant fundraising get-us-to-Germany stuff. Last month, we raised over $3,000 for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. Tomorrow, we're doing some benefit for the Lifelong Aids Alliance. Next week, it's something for Lambert House. Hopefully soon we'll get back out into the greater population. I mean, doing good stuff for the gays is great, but it's not the ONLY way to do good in this world.

So we're hoping to partner with Seattle Scores (they help students who are primarily first-generation immigrants connect with each other, with leadership skills, with soccer skills, and with english/writing skills...they produce "Player-Poets" by combining soccer clinics and games with poetry writing and full-on poetry slams! It's cool!) and whomever else we can promote that will give us some community cred (giving-back) along with more exposure that will help fuel our efforts when it comes to $$-raising for our international tournament play in 2010...

LAST BUT NOT LEAST:
- I no longer have 26lbs of FAT that go with me everywhere
- In the last 6 wks I've reduced that to 19.8 lbs of FAT. NOT BAD!
- I also added 1.9 lbs of lean mass (muscle!)
- Which means I dropped my overall body fat percentage from 22.4% to 17.7%.

Nobody was more shocked than I...my Physical Therapist tells me he suspects one of those hydrostatic tests wasn't entirely accurate (that in his opinion such a feat is nearly impossible). I have to agree with him, sort of.

Then again, fat-tester-guy was all SORTS of excited for me. He told me that I'd somehow achieved a really sustainable fat-loss balance without letting my metabolism shut down, allowing me to put ON muscle at the same time.

"It's an awesome thing!" he raved.

So of course I like HIS version better...
And yes I asked whether being over- or under-hydrated would make much of a difference in this test. For caliper-fat testing, yes. But for the hydrostatic test (dunk tank) - not so much. So.

?

It can be done. You can massively alter your body composition with a little intention and follow-through. I wouldn't say I changed much about my food intake (ie I didn't 'diet) and I wouldn't say I upped my exercise (during this 6 wks I once again got SICK, I tweaked my knee, and I've had to miss several weeks of soccer as a result...and soccer is my primary cardio activity).

BUT!
I have been doing 30min strength sessions at PT (physical therapy) and I've had 6 hour-long sessions of the 'other' PT (personal training) too.

I'm of the opinion that those lunges, squats, and muscle-building ('toning') activities really do work.

One thing that will work your funny bone is if you walk around your newly vacuumed carpets wearing soccer cleats. It makes the whole place look...somewhat pummelled. Which is kind of hilarious.

Time to vacuum again; it's a lot like 'grooming' the carpet.

When did I allow myself to begin using EMOTICONS? :-!
I'm not sure! ;o?
I wish I worked harder at using WORDS. =)
Emoticons are the lazy way, and I'd like to think I wasn't lazy. :-P
But, well. I am. =D
So I'll continue to use them, sometimes, even though it angers me. ;~o

Other things that I'm coming to terms with as I navigate the fantastic month of April - The Mariner's Schedule!


BASEBALL IS BACK.

Baseball is almost the most boring game ever invented, falling on the total excitement scale somewhere between "The Quiet Game" and being forced to play Monopoly on a summer day with your geeky MBA-bound 8-year-old cousin when you'd been invited to Andy Torres's tree-house-at-the-river-with-the-tire-swing-and-the-rest-of-the-cool-kids all-day-while-his-his-mom-makes-awesome-food-and-it's-never-ending-and-then-you-can-ride-dirt-bikes-later-and-finally-watch-movies-after-the-sun-goes-down-party.

But really, the worst thing about baseball is that it causes horrendous traffic.

Oh yeah. I exaggerate NOT. :)

Check it out above, the bastard Mariners have the audacity to have 9 home games [colored dark blue in the graphic] during the next week and a half. That's like EVERY FRIGGIN DAY! Awesome. The one day they don't play is My. Day. Off. SWEET!

I.
Love.
Traffic!

EMOTICON TIME!
I <3 Traf!

Aaah.
In other news, we've had inches and inches of new snow so I've started calling it Second Winter.

BUT!
I woke up to some pretty awesome views today. Please enjoy.



The iPhone leaves something to be desired as a camera, really. The dark and looming clouds off-set the brilliance of the Olympics in a way that is so understated in these photos...

Really, you should just come see for yourself.



AND, last but not least: I'm scared for my job.
Excellent!

New.
Car.
Payment.

Really, no worries.
Heh.

Easter evening at home, after a day of solid and unrelenting rain, saw a moment of heavenly sunbreaks that illuminated the once-dark-world with a sense of rebirth.

HOW EASTER-ISH!

It's all going to work out, I think. Though the knee is still tweaked. I wonder if it has to do with that car accident I was in back in 1990...my knee still bears scars on the skin, who KNOWS what happened to the inside of all its moving parts (eek)! Nonetheless, I'm still taking great pains to rest and relax it.

Wah.

As for the world of duplex-living...well, it's duplistic. Sometimes it's going to be great (or, if not 'great' then perhaps at least 'acceptable' will have to do) - and sometimes it's gonna suck.

Like a sine wave, we'll hopefully move gracefully from trough to crest. Hopefully, with better communication, the highs and lows will diminish so that things equalize in a reasonable manner.

Let's hope!
And I'm hoping.